Star Trek: The Next Generation

Justice

Episode 61

Friday, 10 February 2023

One of the Edo, a scantily-clad man with an exposed belly-button and a completely tucked dick, is standing between Yar and Troi. Yar appears to  be looking off camera at her agent, wordlessly pleading with him to get her out of this stupid show. Troi is looking disdainfully at him.

Star Trek: The Next Generation

Series 1, Episode 8

Stardate: 41255.6

First broadcast on Monday, 9 November 1987

Together at last for the first time, Joe and Nathan find themselves on Planet of the Horny but Unattractive White People, faced with a moral dilemmma that wouldn’t challenge a slow-witted five-year-old. Ah, we have fun, don’t we?

Duration: 1:10:16 · Recorded on Friday, 10 February 2023 · Download · Open in new window

Star Trek: The Next Generation

Manhunt

Episode 54

Friday, 16 December 2022

Lwaxana is sitting at the dinner table in her quarters, staring fixedly at Data, who is talking to her very boringly. Picard is sitting with them. In the background, Mr Homn  yawns ostentatiously.

Star Trek: The Next Generation

Series 2, Episode 19

Stardate: 42859.2

First broadcast on Monday, 19 June 1989

Our writers are on strike this week, and so we’re just going to mark time until we reach the end of this blurb. When an uncomfortably horny Lwaxana Troi beams aboard the Enterprise, a series of events happen, culminating at last in the episode’s closing credits. Mick Fleetwood guest stars as a fish.

Duration: 1:13:43 · Recorded on Monday, 5 December 2022 · Download · Open in new window

Star Trek: The Next Generation

Yesterday’s Enterprise

Episode 1

Thursday, 4 November 2021

Lt. Yar and Lt. Castillo go in for a kiss  on the transporter pad

Star Trek: The Next Generation

Series 3, Episode 15

Stardate: 43625.2

First broadcast on Monday, 19 February 1990

After the Enterprise-C emerges from a mysteriously swirly space anomaly, Joe and Nathan find themselves in an alternate timeline where Star Trek: The Next Generation is dramatically and impractically lit, full of incident, and sceptical about the 1990s belief in the End of History. Star Trek: Discovery Series 1 arrives nearly 30 years too early, in Yesterday’s Enterprise.

Duration: 1:00:01 · Recorded on Tuesday, 21 September 2021 · Download · Open in new window

Star Trek: The Next Generation

The Wounded

Episode 38

Friday, 22 July 2022

Gul Macet looms on the screen of the Enterprise, his fierce look only marred by a weird harness thing he is wearing on his face.

Star Trek: The Next Generation

Series 4, Episode 12

Stardate: 44429.6

First broadcast on Monday, 28 January 1991

Our Irish lad to the war has gone
On the deck of the Phoenix you’ll find him.
He’s got a song that goes on and on
And a sad backstory behind him.

Marc Alaimo’s here in a silly hat
He’s missed some bits while sha-a-ving.
And Captain Maxwell has shown us that
He’s a dick and he isn’t worth saving.

Duration: 1:09:06 · Recorded on Thursday, 21 July 2022 · Download · Open in new window

Star Trek: The Next Generation

Darmok

Episode 49

Friday, 21 October 2022

[alt text]

Star Trek: The Next Generation

Series 5, Episode 2

Stardate: 45047.2

First broadcast on Monday, 30 September 1991

They were victorious. But Enkidu fell to the ground, struck down by the gods. And Gilgamesh wept bitter tears, saying, “He who was my companion, through adventure and hardship, is gone forever.”

Now this is what Star Trek is about — kind, competent people solving a space problem, while learning about the importance of storytelling, connection and understanding. Magnificent.

Duration: 1:04:27 · Recorded on Friday, 14 October 2022 · Download · Open in new window

Star Trek: The Next Generation

The Masterpiece Society

Episode 66

Friday, 26 May 2023

Deanna and a young man are standing in a garden in front of a window looking out onto a hostile alien landscape. They are kissing.

Star Trek: The Next Generation

Series 5, Episode 13

Stardate: 45470.1

First broadcast on Monday, 10 February 1992

This week, the Enterprise crew worry unnecessarily about upending the lives of people living under a weird-ass conservative regime, only to find that those people are desperate to get out and there is no good reason at all to prevent them. Also, Deanna has sex, with unfortunate results.

Duration: 1:08:07 · Recorded on Tuesday, 16 May 2023 · Download · Open in new window

Star Trek: The Next Generation

Power Play

Episode 25

Friday, 22 April 2022

Evil possessed Deanna Troi stands in Ten Forward, firing a phaser.

Star Trek: The Next Generation

Series 5, Episode 15

Stardate: 45571.2

First broadcast on Monday, 24 February 1992

This week, on Untitled Star Trek Project, Joe and Nathan sit down to watch a sentimental sci-fi favourite from their youth, only to discover that it’s really just a police procedural where some of the regular cast get to do funny voices. Still, they get to see Marina menacing people with a gun, so there’s that, I guess.

Duration: 1:09:50 · Recorded on Sunday, 10 April 2022 · Download · Open in new window

Star Trek: The Next Generation

Descent / Descent, Part II

Episode 12

Friday, 21 January 2022

Picard is facing us, flanked by Deanna and Geordi: they are surrounded by Borg

Star Trek: The Next Generation

Series 6, Episode 26 / Series 7, Episode 1

Stardate: 46982.1

First broadcast on Monday, 21 June 1993
and Monday, 20 September 1993

After their critically acclaimed attack on Earth on Stardate 44001.4, the Borg are back with a terrifying new plan — to pad out the the running time of the Star Trek: The Next Generation Series 6 finale and Series 7 opener. Meanwhile, Deanna is amused by Data’s porn consumption, Nathan is impressed by Beverly’s approach to command, and Joe is distracted by the memory of much more enjoyable Star Trek episodes.

Duration: 1:44:07 · Recorded on Saturday, 1 January 2022 · Download · Open in new window

Star Trek: The Next Generation

Sub Rosa

Episode 24

Friday, 15 April 2022

In Beverly's quarters, she and Ronin are embracing urgently. He looks at her, but her eyes are closed.

Star Trek: The Next Generation

Series 7, Episode 14

Stardate: Unknown (2370)

First broadcast on Monday, 31 January 1994

This week, Star Trek takes its first ill-judged stab at the Gothic romance genre. Will Beverly fall for her dead grandmother’s lover (sorry), a rangily unattractive anaphasic ghost who encourages her to give up her job and to stand by helplessly while he attacks her friends? Or will she learn a valuable lesson about not dating sociopathic men? (Temporarily and no respectively, it turns out.)

Duration: 1:01:21 · Recorded on Thursday, 7 April 2022 · Download · Open in new window

Star Trek: The Next Generation

All Good Things…

Episode 18

Friday, 4 March 2022

A shot from above — the bridge crew of the Enterprise-D are all sitting  around the poker table. Picard is dealing

Star Trek: The Next Generation

Series 7, Episodes 25–26

Stardate: 47988

First broadcast on Monday, 23 May 1994

After seven years of thorny space problems and some of the most ingenious space solutions in Starfleet history, what do we have left to learn? Something about tachyon scans and anti-time, inevitably, but also something about the enduring power of love and friendship. Let’s see what’s in here.

Duration: 1:48:51 · Recorded on Tuesday, 1 March 2022 · Download · Open in new window

Star Trek: The Next Generation