In this week’s meeting of the Jeri Ryan Appreciation Society, we watch the most aggressively average Star Trek episode the Randomiser can find, only to discover that there’s still a lot of fun to be had — hilariously sluggish action scenes, a shockingly low-effort Intransigent Alien Race, and some wonderfully subtle and nuanced performances from Ethan Phillips, Tim Russ and Jeri Ryan.
It’s business as usual on Star Trek this week, as the crew of Voyager find themselves in an episode of Secret Army which has been cast, written and directed by latex-headed aliens in Nazi uniforms. Will Voyager’s extensive back catalogue of holodeck programs persuade the Hirogen that there’s more to life than festooning your bulkheads with human skulls? Or will the Captain be forced (reluctantly) to kill Seven of Nine first?
This week: a clever script, a complete absence of banter, a frog alien that scores zero on the B’omar Scale, astonishingly good incidental music by Mahler and Tchaikovsky, and two outstanding performances from Mark Harelik and Kate Mulgrew — all working together perfectly to create one of Voyager’s Best Episodes Ever. Enjoy. (You will.)
For the living know that they shall die: but the dead know not any thing, neither have they any more a reward; for the memory of them is forgotten. (Ecclesiastes 9:5)
This week, like every week, we continue to experience our gradual, humiliating dissolution, to dread our own inevitable deaths, and to consider with dismay the deaths of everyone we have ever known or loved. And so, to cheer ourselves up, we decide to watch an episode of Star Trek: Voyager.
Moral dilemmas abound in this week’s season finale of Star Trek: Voyager. Is it permissible to kill a bunch of people if you miss your bus home? Is it permissible to shoot Slimer from Ghostbusters in the face if he’s intent on drinking all of your precious bodily fluids? Is it permissible to torture Rick Worthy if you’re having a really bad day? And it is obligatory to endow the characters in your Star Trek show with clear and consistent motivations?
A quick trip to the afterlife this week, as B’Elanna discovers the importance of faith and family, and as Voyager itself discovers (too late, perhaps) the importance of the same things. We also learn that hell is the Voyager sets only lit slightly differently, which is something that we had hitherto only suspected.
This week a mediocre script fails to be enhanced in any way by mediocre direction and some mediocre performances. But there’s an upside: a Voyager episode with real consequences that will open up unimaginable new vistas of storytelling and character development. Or not, probably.
These stories will continue for as long as we have the breath to tell them. And as long as our patrons remain wise and compassionate. And Voyager will continue on her journey to the gleaming cities of Earth, where peace reigns and hatred has no home.
Enjoyable. And unexpectedly beautiful at times. Much like Star Trek, really.
It’s our first trip to the Delta Quadrant, and we have questions that need answering. Is B’Elanna’s father a massive racist or just a regular-sized racist? Which is more convincing: Tom and B’Elanna’s baby or an 8472 in a well-lit room? And can we maintain focus all the way through a 45-minute episode of Voyager without a single space anomaly?
This week we drop into a parallel universe where Voyager’s situation is desperate, resources are constrained, and the crew has no alternative but to live by its principles — helping, making friends, reaching out, forming alliances, working together to solve problems, seeking out new life and new civilisations, that sort of thing. Turns out, it would have made quite a good premise for a Star Trek series.
