Hey, Joe. Hi.
So, we are watching an episode of the animated series this week.
We're watching series one, episode six, The Survivor, which is
singular, and I want to start by apologising to Jammer, because I
actually read what he wrote about reviewing the animated series.
He has a little introduction on his website and he does say, you
mustn't compare the star ratings that I give this to the star
ratings.
I give everything else.
I'm grading everything here as an episode of the animated series.
And he's as aware as we are, that there's a single plot, that it's
all weirdly paced, that it's cheap as fuck.
So in a way, constantly ribbing him for giving Bem 2.5 stars, we've
been a little bit unfair.
On the other hand, he does give this 3 stars out of 4 and...
And we will not stop with it.
No, absolutely not.
Unfortunately, you've got a blanket grading system, which means
that, you know, somehow you give, you know, top tier 90s Treks
episodes less styles than them.
I have to tell you the true horror of this, so, Nathan, is that
you know, I was watching it in sort of half past 3 in the morning
last night.
I may not have been at my best whilst trying to focus on this
nuanced, sophisticated piece of television fall asleep a bit.
But I did manage to take it all in unbelievably. you know?
But I wasn't sure whereabouts she was, you know.
And now, unfortunately, they put it behind a paywall on Prime.
So I paid the princely sum of £2 and 50 pence to watch this
episode of the animal.
It's the most off spent watching an episode from Star Trek Project
which if my maths is right, it's about 5 pence per minute.
And I'll say, frankly, I think I may have been cold.
I think you might have been.
I think you might have think that's a terribly sad story.
Goodness me.
So the usual things apply.
The usual caveats apply.
This is incredibly slow. really cheap.
The animation is astoundingly bad.
You have Jimmy Doan.
So simple.
Isn't it?
So simple.
Like, even I didn't have any trouble following this.
There's never any B plot.
It's baffling.
You think how much they pack into it.
Well, lower decks is only 20 minutes into the same, it's true. it's
only 20 minutes.
Every time I think you're so mean on the animator series and then
I think to myself, no way, he's right. prodigy.
They pack a lot into 25 minutes.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I reckon the, you know, the average short trek.
Has more incident and more interesting things to say than one of
these.
So these are very boring, and I can only imagine, if I had been
just a little bit older, and I had experienced Star Trek as a
child, and I was tuning into these thinking, ooh, it's new Star
Trek that's so exciting. been 4 years.
I just can't imagine.
This is like the Star Trek that your mother says that you have at
home.
Do you know what I mean?
Like, it's absolutely kind of the poorest possible substitute for
actual Star Trek imaginable.
So the whole thing...
Yeah, what is it?
Right from the terrible opening music.
It absolutely just reeks of disappointment this show, I think.
Although I do love the music.
Not because it's any good.
No, it is terrible.
But delightfully, because Lower Deck sees itself as the sort of
spiritual successor to this, the 1st animated series, the aliens
here, there's one alien who's called a Vendorian, and I think the
alien looks pretty great.
Actually, the one thing that I...
Oh, I like the way his tentacles sort of whip around people's
necks and knocks them out.
That's quite fun.
But I mean, it looks great.
It's like a pretty great looking monster and obviously you could
never have done anything like it on actual Star Trek.
We did it to Purse.
Yeah, yeah.
I haven't gone to the imagination world too far.
No, no, no.
But it's a pretty cool looking octopus.
And it has appeared twice on lower decks.
So in the very 2nd episode, series one, episode 2, Envoys, there's
a Vendorian that appears whose shape shifting is an Andorian
hilariously.
You know what they do in there, Nathan, because it's so early in
Lower Decks is Rum.
They're basically looking out the screen and gang.
You know what, right?
You may be embarrassed by that lower decks.
But we haven't forgotten it, all right?
We're going to celebrate it.
And next week we'll have Ben as well.
Well, they've had, you know, they've had someone from that same
race and caves.
What's umrous?
Yeah, I can't remember.
She's a regular character, isn't she?
Not her, but one of her species.
Oh, yay.
So Dr. Tana's from the same races.
Yes.
That's right.
So she's there.
There's another episode which absolutely has the Vendorians as
like major players.
It's series 4, episode 8 Caves, which is a really, really
brilliant episode of Lower Decks.
It's really high concept.
It's not, you know, just riffing on an old Star Trek thing.
It's really funny and interesting in itself, and the Vendorians
are behind it all, and they look magnificent in that episode.
Like they look really great.
Be a picture of that.
Absolutely loads of them.
You know, they took they went to the effort of drawing at least 20
of the things.
That's right.
Not just one.
We can only afford to draw one this week.
It's like the writer sat down and said, right, okay, imagine I
took the survivor as my base point, but then made it really, really
good.
Okay, let's go.
Because, you know what?
This isn't good.
And it is very simple, and I mean that in inverted commas.
And all the way through.
I was, like, every time I watch an animated series before, I'm
going to talk to you.
It's I'm like, what the hell am I going to talk about for 20
minutes?
And it's you and me.
We can talk about anything and it's only 20 minutes, but well, the
challenge is on, all right?
That's why I'm thinking we should go in.
I have more things to say, but maybe we need to say that during
the 20 minutes.
Don't waste them yet.
All right.
All we could basically say is we guarantee that next episode we
cover will have more nuance than this.
Well more incident as well.
Probably more slots.
Wherever we go, whatever it is.
Unless we do the animated series again. which we won't.
All right.
Come on, count us in.
Vine.
Three...
And we're off.
It's like the porneest Star Trek music you could possibly have, you
know, sort of lounge music.
Sort of music, I imagine that Riker was listening to.
You know, when he saw Minuet in 1001, 01.
Yeah, so for me, it's just the very opening, you know, just the
opening notes, which are the same as the opening notes of the
original Star Trek theme, except they're wrong.
And it's kind of like, yep, this is this is definitely setting the
tone here.
For me, it's the flat animation.
The Enterprise sort of glides across the screen.
But it does turn a corner and it just goes, whee across the
screen.
It's great.
But it goes around.
There's sort of no 3 dimension to any of that.
There is just so, so weird.
So fucking cheap.
But the music is great, though. they properly animated that one.
They animated it when it came towards the camera because it's
shame.
Look at that green planet there with all the sort of pot marks on
it.
Looks like Commander Adama's face from...
So this is the survivor.
And what's happening?
Captain's log.
Those are spinning quite precariously, you know, aren't they?
Yeah, yeah, well, they seem to have been like hand animated.
That's something.
So this is terrible and fuck this guy, let's say.
So we are picking up a ship.
It's a single person ship.
It's not him.
No, I know.
But so we have someone and it's the guy who played Ted Baxter in
Mary Tyler Moore.
So he's reasonably famous.
He's a bit of a, you know, big deal at this point in TV history
but he does a lot of shitty filmation.
Now, what's this?
So, what the fuck is the transporter Chiefs moustache?
And then why does this guy have that moustache?
It's the 1970s.
Well, I haven't explored too much 1970s porn, a little bit, but
not much, but basically every romantic hero in all 70s gay porn
looks like Carter Wilson.
Every single one.
Yeah, sort of wavy hair, enormous moustache, a bit like, yeah, a
cowboy out of time.
Like Jason King or something.
So I and everybody is so in love with him, aren't they?
I'm like, 0 my god.
Castle Wilson, the man who made a huge fortune, despite the fact
we don't have any money, and went and saved all those colony
worlds.
So what should have happened is he should have been guillotined
his money should have been confiscated, and it should have been
forcibly used to save those colony worlds.
This is what shits me, is that we have a, you know, like a
philanthropist.
Fuck that guy.
What's he doing in my socialist utopia?
Spock of all the inhospitable things you've ever said to make him
prove who he is.
Yeah, because he's a fucking octopus, right?
Yeah, not that we work that out, though, can I say?
The enterprise Nathan has rescued a living legend, says Captain
Kirk, in his voice over.
Okay, so it turns out his fiancé's a board, just by the most
amazing coincidence.
What the fuck is the computer voice doing in this scene?
Did you listen to that?
It looks like shit.
Is it is it?
It's a gel huffing alien?
Like, I just don't know what's going on.
They put a fingerprint in the animation.
That won't cost nothing.
Just put your finger on there.
There you go.
And did you know what, right?
This is our fucking animation.
Are they still got all this terrible low tech that all they could
afford when they had a set?
Come on now.
Think outside the box.
I kind of like that actually that they're just reproducing the
kind of crappy, the fabulous tech that they had in the original
series.
I mean, you know what?
I'm going to say it a 1000000 times now.
Every time we do these episodes.
Look, he's going, 0 yeah, your test readings. they don't come out
quite as they should do, you know, so off.
And yeah, that's it. 10 minutes until he goes, do you know what?
I don't think he's actually that Carter fellow.
We thought it was octopus.
Oh, here she is.
No, this is the nurse.
This isn't... this is chapel.
This is Nurse Chapel. that's Magell.
I say she looks lustrous in animation.
She does.
She's very blind.
Oh, here she is.
What's the lady's name?
That's it.
So Anne is Nichelle doing her best white lady voice and it's
awful.
She's asked to play, just a snivelling, useless woman, isn't she?
Yeah, it's miserable.
So it's bafflingly weird too.
Michelle is seen in the background of various shots too.
Like, not Nichelle, a drawing of Nichelle, like, um, uh, Aurora.
But Mress is there as the, uh, this is her 1st episode. as the
communications officer.
And that's...
She's the one that gets her transmission later.
So, so cool.
So that's majestic decoration.
That's Majell doing a sexy voice.
Well, they thought to themselves, you know what, right?
I know we love Ahura, but we could have a cat woman, you know. be
really cool.
That's true, but they could have gotten...
So we should have to do the Catwoman rather than do this weird
lady.
So basically Carter now breaks up with Anne. and she turns
straight to the camera and this guy sort of falls down top quality
direction.
Oh God.
I'm so moved, honestly.
Maybe if it was like a regular, we'd feel something.
No, not a lot because they haven't established anything.
No, but it would mean, who cares?
It would mean more than Sulu's boyfriend, the...
Lieutenant nobody.
You know, Sulu's boyfriend who's been missing for 5 years.
Oh, here we go.
Turning into it.
Transforming... into a Vendorian.
Yeah.
See?
That looks so great.
The head is great.
I do love the head with all the eyes.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And they it looks like he's giving Kirk a hug.
It's wonderfully gently puts him back on the band, which is sort
of touching.
I think he looks awesome. that octopus looks fucking great.
So you're saying they kept that sort of transfer effect between
you.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. the same effect with it, shape, shape, shifts in
envoys.
It's pretty great.
Mate, Joe, I must say your hair just looks so amazing in
animation.
There's not a hair out of place.
It's so low effort, it's just unbelievable, the animation.
That was a whole shot that lasted 2 or 3 seconds in which she just
blinked.
Like it was just a drawing and it just blinked and that was all we
did.
It's so cheap.
It's so shitty.
At least when we're on the bridge, the sort of the coloured lights
on the panels there, sort of flicker and move.
So there's a tiny bit of, well, vision in the animation.
Oh, Arax, look.
So we've got Aryx and Emriz there now.
I mean, it's already a better crew than the original series.
Right, yeah.
We can just forgive them for not hiring Walter, I think, then.
Did they have any of Eric's people in Kurtzman trip?
Do we see any of those?
Oh, fabulous.
Live action?
No, no, lowered eggs, obviously.
Oh, I'd love to see you like a CGI one though.
Wouldn't that be great?
I shouldn't do that.
There's still time, strangely wells.
But what if they introduced Arex that you could meet Arex?
That would be incredible.
I've just got a new posting, you know.
We're going to have some amazing adventures on the Enterprise, I'm
sure.
Maybe that's the character that Reese Darby is playing in series
three.
You heard it here first.
I'm tiled Star Trek Project phones.
He just sits there smiling quietly.
He has a New Zealand accent, obviously.
So I've got a sort of Trump produce a little bit, okay?
If I can.
And so this man Carter, a wealthy man, saved a colonist, blah, blah
blah, went down onto this planet or did he crash?
I can't remember.
He went down onto this planet and they found him, these Vendorians
but unfortunately he was near death.
He leaves for about a year.
So that's...
Oh, okay.
I sort of looked after him. stroked his face with tentacles, things
like that.
And then he died and then that's what they do is then take on the
form of people that have died.
Yeah, so because he spent a lot of time with him, he was able not
just to look like him, which he can do with anyone he meets, but
he actually starts to become him.
And that's like, that's actually a credible Star Trek plot. isn't
it?
I mean, it's a little bit like, like, maybe what happens in
Silicon Avatar where, um, that, you know, that, the...
It's a good star of a plot, though.
Yeah, and it doesn't really get off the starting line.
So it's an idea, and it's a terrible idea.
You know, the Vendorian becomes human because he spent, Oh, look
we're making Kirk watch the previous scene on telly to prove...
So we can reuse the animation.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So, you know, there's something there.
You know, he becomes a human being and, uh, you know, he saves
them from the Romulans, because he identifies with them and
doesn't want to bring Antony harm.
Um, and so that was basically the only thing I liked about this
you know, when they went into the neutral zone and then the
Romulans surrounded them and I was like, my God, we're going to
have a space power in a minute.
How's the animated series going to do that?
Yeah, yeah, yeah. a shitty space battle.
There's only one shot, I think.
No, no, they shoot quite a bit.
It's pretty good.
Have you ever had an experience like that, you know, you're just
sort of mining your own business and then this tentacle starts
wrapping itself around your neck?
Well, not a tentacle, but sure.
Look, we said we weren't going to talk about what happened when we
watched Justice, all right?
We was all very turned on by that man's camel toe.
Oh my god, that was really something.
So now everyone's sort of doing possessed acting as well, but they
can only do it with their voice.
Yeah, yeah, because everyone looks identically the same because
there's literally no facial performance involved in the show. mild
monotone, don't you?
sort of semi-robot.
Yeah.
So now McCoy or Vendorian McCoy is breaking up with Anne again.
Is that right?
That's what's happening, poor woman.
Honestly, no wonder she's snivelling.
Yes, my dear, but he just doesn't want you, that's all.
All right.
That's right.
He said, forget him.
No, it is McCoy.
Stop hanging around his front floor.
Stop texting him.
If I was her, I'd do a Beverly Crusher style flounce out of the
room and go, you know, I've already had it from him.
I don't need it from you But she does have a voice like that
doesn't she?
I think it's Nichelle doing what a white lady sounds like.
It's awesome I think everybody should watch an animated series
episode and then go and watch any any lower decks episode and
compare the voice actor in the tune.
Okay?
Nowhere else in Star Trek affects nothing else. you'll see a
golfing quality between 2 points of Star Trek.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Because the voice acting in lower decks is someone else.
It's great, isn't it?
They're all really good, whereas everyone's just phoning this in.
No one gives a shit.
No one's got an emotion in this.
They all kind of say their dialogue like this.
Yeah.
I mean, at least Nemoy's got a reason for that.
Yeah, yeah.
No, this is just preposterous, right?
I must have taken a little nap, Nathan.
Well, that's, I mean, that's what that's how Jim experienced as
well.
He had a lap.
A nap, a lap.
How about that?
I did like that line.
I've never known you to sleep on the laboratory floor.
Now this is fucking ridiculous.
This is his lab.
There's something wrong with this room, but I can't put my finger
on it.
It's there's 3 bio beds instead of 2 and somehow McCoy doesn't
notice that and neither does Spock.
I mean, like, what's that?
I suggest you so dumb.
Show yourself, Winston.
All right.
Or I'm going to pour this deadly acid all over the bar bed.
And I know it's you.
Yeah, I'm going to pour acid on you as well.
That's awesome.
That is so dumb.
So fortunately, Kirk learnt to count to 3 at the academy and so he
noticed the extra bed and now he's going to pour acid.
There's just no type of a brain cell in this series.
So dumb.
Look, it looks great.
Doesn't the vendor look just awesome.
But then they sort of follow up with loads of close-ups of McCoy
so they don't have to animate anything else, you know?
They're only doing eyes and a mouth in this scene.
Yeah.
Although, if you sort of look at the Vendorian, for any length of
time, you see that the tentacles move in the same pattern over and
over again.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
I love how it works Like, I love how it works.
It's awesome.
Look how it works. will take anything.
It's just true. will take anything.
Well, it's just sort of hovers just across the ground, doesn't
it?
It's a bit nomad, isn't it?
sort of the way he hovers along.
Except we're in animation, so there's no strings.
Oh, he does look like a porn star.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Oh, God.
This is so funny.
You're not gonna shoot me.
It's my job, Carter. shoot you.
But then she doesn't.
She says, he's a little bit like my boyfriend so I didn't shoot
him.
I just, I think you are useless.
You're a slide in the whole thing is when Kurt goes, you could
have stopped him and she's like, I couldn't murder the man who
looks like the man I loved.
Just like, wow, you are going to Starbase 80, you stupid cow.
Like, what the hell?
Now, you might think I'm taking a piss by doing that voice, yeah
but had I gone to the studios and done that voice at the time, they
would have hired me on the spot.
Yeah they probably would have.
They probably would have given Michelle a week off.
They say, well, Michelle's doing communication songs.
Special guest star. time traveller, Joe Fold.
Joe's doing Anna.
Joe what?
Actually, to be fair, if I did invent a time machine.
I could think of worse things too than go back and voice something
from the animated series.
Yeah, yeah, going back and troll the animated series would be
awesome.
I played it at producers.
You know, I think Shatner could dial it up a bit, you know.
He's not really trying, is he?
Is he on the phone from his fear?
No, I'd be saying, I don't think there are enough parts in this
episode for Jimmy.
I think you should give him more parts.
He could play Anne.
In fact, let's just dispense at the rest of the call.
We'll have Jimmy and Nachelle do the lot.
Exactly.
No, Jimmy can do the women as well.
Now look, that does look like a Romulan on your screen, doesn't
it?
They've good.
It does look like a woman from the original series.
Yeah, yeah.
Well, I mean, what is the Romulans?
Much like everything else is.
Only his mouth moves on his face.
Yeah.
Oh, the little lights under the under the screen move, obviously.
Yes.
It does sort of go to show.
And I am going to include animated Kurtzman track as well.
It does go to show that the, the, and Armenia is genuinely not the
nuance you get in a facial performance.
You know, when you watch an animation as bad as this.
And it's just everybody appears to be an automaton.
Yeah, it just goes to show what the actor actually brings to the
screen.
And in this case, almost nothing at all, I would say.
We are going to get a mess coming up, aren't we, or not?
He must have knocked me out long enough, Nathan, to come to the
bridge.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
We watched them do that.
Here she is.
There's...
Fabulous.
I mean, it's a Maine. an enormous man cascades over her
shoulders.
Yeah, yeah yeah.
But Dr. Tana's sexier though, isn't she?
She's certainly, um...
She's very sexy when, you know, they all go sex mad.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But she's scratching at shacks all over the place.
Her and Shacks fucking in the holidays.
Unbelievable.
She goes, she goes, She's awesome.
She's so brilliant.
Just absolutely stupid.
Look at Eric's hands there.
He's only got 3 fingers.
Yeah, yeah.
Very enormous claws.
But he has that arm coming out of his chest.
It's good that there's sort of no sophisticated technology.
It's all just big buttons, so he's got a press, you know?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I'm sure you can operate programmable matter with just 3 fingers.
Now, this is the bit where I stopped understanding what was going
on.
So this guy comes in, that's Scotty apparently, although it looks
nothing like Jimmy, and then he just comes in and pulls out all
the wires.
Disturbed, though. beyond the Vendorian.
I noticed the one bit of animation. they actually really gave some
definition to was Jimmy Dewan's arse in that scene when he was
knocked out.
Someone spent some time enjoying that.
He's doing so much work, he said to the animators, you know
please.
Give me a good bum.
Yeah.
Oh dear.
Although, it's kind of refreshing for him to actually play Scotty
for once.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
That's quite not a shot look looking out through the, through the
wall panel.
Yeah, that's not bad, is it?
With some wires.
I'll take anything at this point.
Yeah, yeah.
Okay, so we've gotta fix the thing.
You're not getting past me this time.
I won't allow you.
And he goes, just like a poor movie.
You're practical as well.
Lovely.
Now he's coming on, coming onto her.
So creepy.
Deep feelings, you know, that only I can express.
But what I think is actually great is the 2 of them go off
together and try and make it work.
It's her and an octopus in a hostile galaxy and I think, you know
I somehow think those crazy kids are going to make it.
I think it's awesome.
Yeah, no, it's, we're all about cross species, you know.
It's more than Beverly managed at the end of the host.
That's all I can say.
Yep I don't think humanity's ready for this bosexuality.
What about 100 years ago when Anne was boffing that fucking
octopus?
Like, yeah, someone should have said that.
I mean, if lower decks have followed it up, they were sort of
hybrid human octopus.
I've been there for it.
So good.
Oh, there's still time or did they drop all the episodes of lower
decks this season?
No, there's only 3 at the moment.
So they're doing it once a week.
Oh, there's still time, though.
That's all right.
I know you've already drawn it, but we're hoping.
Oh, dear.
You know, Kirk's quite buffing animation as well, isn't he?
That's weird.
I wasn't that muscly.
Well, he doesn't have to keep pulling his stomach in the whole
time, is the, is the thing.
Like, is he doesn't walk around with his shirt off, though, in the
animated series.
No, they'd have to draw a torso. all sweaty.
Okay.
Damage to the secondary production system.
The Romulans are firing.
I mean this is supposed to be the exciting climax now.
Yeah.
And but this is the bit where Carter, is that his name?
Carter Saines.
Carso, yeah.
Yeah.
Carter saves him because he realises that he doesn't want Anne to
be harmed and he remembers what Carter's actually like, even
though he's just a Vandorian copy of him.
So in the lower decks episode is the fact that, you know, they are
influenced by the people that their form that they take.
Is that important to the plot?
No, no.
It's just, it's just someone, like, they, they come into, in, in
envoys, it's like they, they're on this planet and it's Mariner
and Boimler, and it's the 2nd episode, so it has to establish that
Mariners are badass, you know, and that she is better and cooler
than Boimler at dealing with aliens.
And so we go into an Andorian bar or the Andorian sector of this
town and he misunderstands what's going on because it turns out
that the old man that they're all bullying is actually just a
Vendorian pretending to be an Andorian and, you know, it escapes
and stuff.
And like it's actually quite a good fun episode.
It's a really good episode too for the show because it just spends
time with Boheemler and Mariner and we get to know what they're
both like.
And then, you know, there's still time, you know, you remember
that end of series one of TNG when those hicks came out of Spended
Animation.
You know, there could be a lower decks episode in the latter half
of the season where Anne suddenly steps out of a cloud.
Hello.
Where am I in the future?
Well, any of these could be in Stranger Worlds.
That's what I think.
That's what we love about it.
Like, you know, there's nothing they won't cherry pick.
We've come to that point, you know, if the outrageous O'Connor can
turn up twice.
Yeah, definitely they won't do different series.
I mean, I think it would have been quite nice if a Vendoran are
joined the crew here.
They open up just lots of different aliens.
No, he's feeling bad about himself now.
He's a loser in the Vandorians.
Can't you imagine a lot of situations where that octopus creature
would come in very handy.
Well, the Romulans were using it as a spy, remember?
Go get out into space and stick your tentacles in their gunports
right?
No, the really baffling thing that it did, it turned itself into
the deflector shield.
So it damaged the deflector shield because it was a communist
infiltrator that it fell in love with Anne and then it decided to
save her by turning into a deflector shield.
So that's kind of weird and ridiculous.
But I kind of like it, like whatever.
Did you hear that?
He goes, you'll have to stand trial, says Kirk.
But given the fact that we're all alive because of you, that may
be in your favour, in the trial.
Yep, and you're rich.
So you can probably buy off the judge as well.
Oh, of course, yeah.
I mean, they like to pretend they're above this sort of thing in
the future, but really.
I love this. so yep.
I have been thinking about those tentacles and I've decided that I
want to give a relationship a go is what Anne's thinking to
herself, I think.
I mean, she does, forgive me, but she's thinking about those
tentacles.
I think she is.
You would.
It's a bit like Kira when no dope proposition does.
It's like, actually, I can see the upside, it is.
Now, this is the longest crap joke in any Star Trek episode.
It goes on and on and on.
And I actually think Spock Zinger is pretty great where he says, oh
if we'd had 2 Spocks, that would be really terrible.
And he goes, oh, if we had 2 McCoys, that might just bring our
medical, you know, capabilities up to acceptable levels.
But all the time it's that plinky bullshit crap joke music at the
end.
It's really terrible.
It's not even as good as the usual crap joke music that we're used
to from the original series.
It's a substandard version of that.
And it goes for ages.
They're clearly super pleased with the crap joke there at the
end.
But, you know, like, there is a scintilla of wit, like you said, in
that last light. completely devoid. the rest of the episode, you
know?
That's a pretty good singer, I reckon.
That is an original series quality, uh, quality zinger.
Well, sort of average original series. episode.
I remember like Gemma, we are judging this on anime series
standards.
Well, I mean, it gave us a gift of the Vendorian.
Indeed, it was that...
Yeah.
Guess what it is?
Is it just a more normal sort of straightforward Star Trek episode
that deals with the sort of themes that Star Trek deals with?
It's less weird.
It's not like the time trap or that magics of megas 2.
The counterclock incident.
The counterclock incident. you remember that?
With the black stars on the white background.
Yeah, yeah.
All of that stuff is really weird and strange, and this is much
much more standard except for the Vandorian, which we wouldn't
have been able to do on original Trek.
And so I can see why people like this because it's almost like
having Star Trek back only in a much cheaper and shittier form.
Yeah, but like, do you know, when we watch 90s trek?
Yeah.
There are many times.
I mean, we just watched Man Other People, and it was really very
dull.
But I can't think of a better time we've ever had doing untitled
Star Trek project.
This is really very dumb in comparison, but it's so boring.
Like, if you're gonna be dumb, be ridiculous, you know?
Yeah.
Yeah, and the plotting is just so basic, isn't it?
There's never a twist of any kind.
There's never a character turn or a reversal or any of those
wonderful things that all the great playwrights gave us.
You know, they're all ignored in favour of, okay, well, come onto
the ship, alien.
Oh marvellous, so that's BM, that's the Vendorian, whatever you
want it to be, you know.
Well, we'll just go down to this world.
Oh, we're in a terrible situation.
Oh, the alien saved the day.
Oh, ha ha.
We all be friends the end.
That's basically an animated series episode.
Pretty much.
I can't wait to do another one.
Yeah, no, we've still got some left on the train.
All right, it's the end of the episode, and given that this is an
experience that we probably don't want to repeat in a hurry, it's
your turn to pick something of higher quality.
So what series are you choosing from?
To quote Captain Cisco, there's no guarantee of that.
Okay, so I have done my usual when I'm feeling a bit lazy.
That's all the shows. absolutely everything.
I mean, it does usually skewer this in 90s direction because it's
so fucking many of them, but like, let's see what we, and it is
the 19s.
Your random Star Trek Voyager episode is oh, good grief.
Season six, episode 13, virtuoso.
Oh, is that good?
That is the episode.
No, it's really bad.
It's the one where the doctor goes down to the planet of the
little people.
They're all little people with squeaky voices, but they've never
heard music before.
So he starts singing, you know, his operas and they turn him into
a massive celebrity and it goes to his head and by the end of the
episode. he wants to leave the ship because he's so adored by the
little people.
It's really very terrible.
I feel as if we should have something a bit better than that after
watching the animated series.
Okay.
Do you know what?
I don't want to do this.
But you're going to say we should, but I don't want to do this
because I think we've done too many great DS9 episodes lately.
And this is possibly the best of all.
Season one, episode 19 duet.
But we should keep going because we cannot be left with all the
dregs, you know?
Yeah, yeah, fair enough. save it.
If we're gonna do, if we're gonna do it, do your side episode, it
should be a stinker.
And this one is a DS9 episode.
Oh, it's not a stinker, but it's an interesting one to talk
about.
Season four, episode 17, a session.
That's the one with the 2nd emissary who comes out of the world.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's sort of like the absolute middle pin of Cisco's journey where
he goes from, oh, how annoying I'm the emissary too.
Excepting it in this area.
In a way.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
Oh, oh, and it's got that great subplot as well, where Keiko comes
back to the station after all that time away.
Do you remember when she went away in House of Quark?
To make a film?
And O'Brien feels like he's just got a dog, her footsteps, and
that's what she wants, and she's like, oh, God, how do I get him
out of my hair?
Like, he's so annoying.
So she has to manipulate a circumstance to get him off with
Julian.
It's actually Keiko in a really fun way.
I wonder if we should do that.
Yeah, it sounds fun to do a business as usual, kind of, you know
like a non-giant event episode of Deep Sea.
Really interesting stuff with Kira and the religion aspects as
well.
It's kind of quite sensitively done, but pointing out all the
contradictions, you know?
Right, okay.
Yeah, no, that sounds good.
I'm up for that for sure.
After the animated series.
The only way is up.
Yep, absolutely.
You've been listening to entitled Star Trek Project with Joe Ford
and Nathan Bottomley.
We're online at untitledstar trekproject.com where you can find
subscription links and links to our social media accounts.
Our podcast artwork is by Kayla Ciceran and the theme was composed
by Cameron Lamb.
This episode was recorded on the 5th of November 2024 and released
on the 8th of November.
We'll see you next time for Star Trek Deep Space 9 at session.
Yeah, that's a good D. That is a good deal.
Okay, that's good.
But not like an out and out classic, but it is a goodie.
Yeah, sort of mid, right.
That the one, right?
That's the one where and please keep this in mind when you watch
it.
Ira Bear.
He doesn't like the episode because he had a particular guest
actor in mind who took the part and then had to pull out at the
last minute.
And he's like, do you know what?
He goes, it is, I know, he goes, I recognise this is a really
great episode with thoughtful things to say.
And the guy playing a Korum Lam is good, but David Warner was
supposed to play that part.
Oh, okay.
And he really wanted Warner and DS9.
Yeah, yeah, of course.
Oh, that's a shame.
That's interesting.
And he would have been brilliant.
Yeah, of course.
So good.
Let me, you know what?
dash in a 2nd because I'm going to save this and send it to you
now because you need this, don't you?
You need this like ASAP.
Oh, man, I hate dashing.
That's right.
That's all right.
I'll be on the chat.
I'll say good night to you before I go to bed and stuff. you have
to sort of run around.